Tuesday, 11 March 2014

Metallic Sonatas





The Rapture turned out to be a faulty product recall and we, the remnant, felt as free as mice in a house with only senile felines.  Then the new angels came to play.

The prompt is from Trifecta - 33 words including a palindrome (highlighted).

This is the last prompt Trifecta are running and I was sad to read that the site is closing its doors.  I've not been a member for very long but I've enjoyed responding to the prompts (those strict word counts have really helped me tighten up my prose) and meeting the other members of this great community.   The feedback I've had has been a great encouragement for me to sit down and write, and I've enjoyed reading the work of such a diverse and talented crew.     I'm hoping that I can keep in touch with, and follow the continued work of the rest of you.    To Trifecta and the people behind it - my thanks and gratitude, and best wishes for your future life and works.
Posted by at
Labels: ,

38 comments:

  1. Ally 11 March 2014 at 11:06

    Wow

    Well crafted!

    Dark and I like the twist on religion

    Right up my alley

    Ally :)

    @allyatherton

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Unknown17 March 2014 at 11:04

      Thanks Ally - glad it hit the right note

      Delete
  2. Ally 11 March 2014 at 11:07

    My favourite so far I think......

    ReplyDelete
  3. Renee11 March 2014 at 11:34

    New Angels? That line actually caused a shiver. Good job!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Unknown17 March 2014 at 11:05

      Thanks Renee, shivers = success in my opinion

      Delete
  4. Wordifull Melanie11 March 2014 at 12:02

    Great take on the prompt and cool palindrome :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Shailaja V11 March 2014 at 12:03

    Beautiful.. I read this many times over...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Unknown17 March 2014 at 11:06

      Thanks Shailaja - and the beauty of a 33 word prompt is that it can be re-read more easily

      Delete
  6. TMWHickman11 March 2014 at 14:25

    I love the lyrical flow of this, and I wonder what those new angels have in mind. Great work!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Unknown17 March 2014 at 11:06

      I dread to think what their plans are - even the traditional angels had to prefix every meeting with mortals by saying "don't be afraid" - which tells us something I think...

      Delete
  7. Anonymous11 March 2014 at 17:44

    faulty product recall - well, I guess I've gotta' give ya' an Amen to that - hehe

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Unknown17 March 2014 at 11:07

      I've wanted to use that line for a while (and will probably do so again)

      Delete
  8. Thomas Charles MacInnes11 March 2014 at 23:17

    New angels should be a good thing, right? If Trifecta has to go then, posts like this one will remind us all of how great the writing can be any given week. You have consistently produced stellar work and I am the better for having read your great writing. I look forward to reading more of your work in the future; perhaps atop the Best Seller list!? Best of luck in your future endeavours in a world beyond Trifecta. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Unknown17 March 2014 at 11:07

      Thanks Tom, you're far too kind but your words are very much appreciated. I'm hoping to stay in touch with the ex Trifectans as much as I can, it's been a great forum for sharing and meeting.

      Delete
  9. Witch Hazel12 March 2014 at 07:56

    Very clever palindrome, embedded in an intriguing story

    ReplyDelete
  10. Leigh12 March 2014 at 15:18

    I love this--the dystopian neck-wring of religion is icing to the great palindrome. Senile felines. (That's hard for me to type for some reason because I keep hearing "seline feline," ear wanting it to rhyme, I guess.) Some lyrical phrasings here in a compressed piece; I really enjoyed "we, the remnant" (echoes of "we, the people") and "new angels."

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Unknown17 March 2014 at 11:08

      Thank you Leigh - I do enjoy the discipline of fitting as much as I can into 33 words

      Delete
  11. kymm12 March 2014 at 19:04

    I am amazed at how perfectly integrated that bizarre palindrome is in this great piece. Kudos, TM!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Anonymous12 March 2014 at 23:14

    Ooooo. Ominous fun, this one!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Unknown17 March 2014 at 11:09

      Ominous and fun - I enjoy that combination, thank you.

      Delete
  13. Lyssa Medana13 March 2014 at 13:20

    Intriguing as ever! LM x

    ReplyDelete
  14. Kir13 March 2014 at 17:42

    such great work from you , always. A thoughtful piece that was fun and crafted so well I didn't want it to end. The new angels coming to play sounded foreboding but needed.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Unknown17 March 2014 at 11:09

      I think that world will have interesting times to come

      Delete
  15. Kir13 March 2014 at 17:43

    (Hit enter too soon)
    I won't be leaving, I love reading you and look forward to all the writings of the "Manor" :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Unknown17 March 2014 at 11:09

      It's mutual - thanks Kir - you've been a real encouragement to me

      Delete
  16. Anonymous13 March 2014 at 21:34

    This is fabulous. Great, wonderful writing from start to finish.

    I'm with you on the strict word count thing - that has really helped me fine-tune my writing. It's a really great exercise, for sure. I hope I don't lose track of you. I love reading your work!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Unknown17 March 2014 at 11:10

      Stay in touch, please, I want to maintain contact with as many Trifectans as I can - I've really enjoyed being part of this. Thank you for the feedback

      Delete
  17. Unknown14 March 2014 at 02:36

    Awesome! Complete story in 33 words...that can't be beat. I hope to keep up with your stuff, as I really like the voice and content here. A Rapture gone awry, and the left behind get run of the place? Brilliant. Nice work.

    ReplyDelete
  18. shannon14 March 2014 at 18:10

    Fantastic, seriously. That ending sentence closes your 33 word tale, but explodes with possibilities for the reader as to what comes next.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Unknown17 March 2014 at 11:10

      Realy appreciate your feedback, thank you!

      Delete
  19. Anonymous17 March 2014 at 18:50

    Will you please notify me when you release the sequel and/or the prequel. I'm hooked!

    ReplyDelete

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)