Friday 2 August 2013

Shades



(a writing prompt from Trifecta)



Slumping, empty, day by day
A life lived bleak in shadow play

The light burns bright but far away
And all is shown in shadow play

When cold night comes shall shadows stay?

39 comments:

  1. *sigh*, I actually sighed at the end of reading this.

    I'd like to think that the shadows always stay, to keep us company, if nothing else.

    TGIF Thomas :)

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    1. Thanks indeed - though alas it was more a case of ODIM by the time I read this comment :D Still Friday again soon.

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  2. Very good one!

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  3. Sad and real - A life lived bleak in shadow play ... , excellent entry!

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  4. I like the "shadow play". I think on cold nights the shadows rest somewhere else, far away.

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  5. Oh, yes. They stay.

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  6. The shadows are joined by all the ones not strong enough to battle t5he sun at night.

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  7. lovely melancholy

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  8. Beautiful and poetic piece!

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  9. Kind of a dark side to Tyger, Tyger. Lots of layers.
    Nice poem, Marlowe.

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  10. "The light burns bright but far away..."

    That line is stunning-as is this entire piece, Thomas!

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  11. I like the playful rhyming.

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  12. Nice. The repetition works really well here in such a short piece.
    Laura

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  13. I love that you carried the rhyme through all five lines. It added a wonderful rhythm. Nice piece. :)

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    1. Thank you - 33 words is a short space for variety so I went the other way :D

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  14. I also love the rhyming and repetition.

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  15. Someone above used the word "melancholy" to describe this, and that's one of the words that came to my mind when I first read it too--melancholy, elegiac, bleak, but with the tiniest glimmer of hope, however far off it might be. "Shades" is one of my favourites this week.

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  16. Beautifully done! Love the rhythm and the pacing. Love the closing line.

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  17. This is as lilting and cool and pensive as a full-moon night. Loved it.

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  18. This is great. It has a bit of that dark undertone under the playful meter. Thank you for linking up!

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  19. Very dark, with an under tow of desperation. I like it!

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    1. Thanks TMW - that's what I was going for

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