(a prompt from Light and Shade Challenge using the following picture)
I wake, with slumber fogging up my head
And turn to where your sleeping shadow lies
And stretch my arm across the half cold bed
And miss your eyes, and miss and miss your eyes
Coffee for one, and while the water drips
The light moves slyly and I watch entranced,
Upon the kitchen floor, a cruel eclipse,
The moving shadows of the waltz we danced
I need to clear my thoughts, and breathe fresh air
But in the garden there’s no solace found
In silhouette a summer’s kiss hangs there
Upon the fence, and in the past I’m drowned
The car was coming fast, too fast it sped
A thunderbolt, a kraken on the lane,
Then painted new in Rorschach-inkblot red
It left you there, unmade, in shaded rain
The future’s long and cold. How can I last
So haunted by the shadows of the past?
You poem fits perfectly..well done
ReplyDeleteThanks PMC - glad you liked it
DeleteThat is such a beautiful poem, so vivid LM x
ReplyDeleteI hoped so - thank you
DeleteHeartbreaking emotions here, so well done in it's imagery.
ReplyDeleteThanks Tara, much appreciated
DeleteHow heartbreaking... I could feel his pain with each word and image you chose. It left me feeling so sad for the poor man who had lost his love. Beautifully written.
ReplyDeleteBlessings,
Cheryl
Thanks Cheryl - I appreciate the feedback. Glad you liked it.
DeleteDeep.
ReplyDeleteI like it. Great imagery.
Ally :)
Thanks Ally, much appreciated
DeleteGreat imagery.
ReplyDeleteThank you - glad you liked it
DeleteLovely and sad. Great first stanza that could almost stand alone. And I like the line - the moving shadows of the waltz we danced. I'm enjoying the entries.. thanks for setting up the challenge.
ReplyDeleteYou're welcome Steph and I'm glad you liked the poem- to be honest I was tempted to stop after the first stanza too, being foolishly pleased with the repetition of "miss"
DeleteFantastic sonnet. At the end of the first stanza (yes, brilliant) I feared a turn into darkness (oh no! what did he do to her eyes???) but love the way you played it. The dancing shadows, and especially the long cold future. < 3
ReplyDeleteThanks Kymm, glad it worked for you
DeleteExcellent as always. The sense of loss, and of being completely surrounded by reminders of what had been, builds a foundation of sorrow. Then, the reason for it - the horror remembered. Excruciating.
ReplyDeleteExcruciating is good in some contexts I think. Thanks Joe.
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